I just called The Farm. You know, it felt like I was just wishing on a star but I did it anyway. I know I can't afford it. I know that it is too far away. Troy doesn't have any vacation. I know it is just impracticle....but I called anyway.
I talked to Pamela Hunt when I called and she asked some initial questions and told me, "You are actually a really good candidate to deliver here at the Farm. We haven't done twins in a while and the local Dr's don't like it when we do, but you have a strong background. That isn't a yes. I need to talk to everyone because we would need a full team on board for you, but I'll discuss it with them and get back to you."
What if it did work? Oh my. What if Ina May was at my birth? I am just dreaming.
But at least I am still dreaming...
Tuesday, May 29, 2012
Tuesday, May 8, 2012
Getting big
Ok, time to get personal:
So I started at 110lbs. The most I've ever gained in a pregnancy was with E and I put on 35 lbs. He was a good 8 and 1/2 lb baby and so I don't cook them small. Well, twins is something new. I've put on 32 lbs already and I am only 27 weeks. And these babies aren't looking small at all....twins often run smaller than single babies, but not only are these boys big for twins, they are running over the average size for singletons!
I am so grateful everyday that things are going so well. It has been a perfect pregnancy and knowing that everything is healthy with them and me and that they are big and moving (really moving!) and developing exactly how they should just brings me to my knees to say thank you to my Heavenly Father.
I can be a spoil sport and so I worry that things are so good now, that something awful is going to happen later to balance it out, but I try and smack myself every time I think that way. *SMACK*
Back to big bellies: well, this belly is large enough now that I can't see my toes or even my knees when I look down. And every time I do look down....I smile.
So I started at 110lbs. The most I've ever gained in a pregnancy was with E and I put on 35 lbs. He was a good 8 and 1/2 lb baby and so I don't cook them small. Well, twins is something new. I've put on 32 lbs already and I am only 27 weeks. And these babies aren't looking small at all....twins often run smaller than single babies, but not only are these boys big for twins, they are running over the average size for singletons!
I am so grateful everyday that things are going so well. It has been a perfect pregnancy and knowing that everything is healthy with them and me and that they are big and moving (really moving!) and developing exactly how they should just brings me to my knees to say thank you to my Heavenly Father.
I can be a spoil sport and so I worry that things are so good now, that something awful is going to happen later to balance it out, but I try and smack myself every time I think that way. *SMACK*
Back to big bellies: well, this belly is large enough now that I can't see my toes or even my knees when I look down. And every time I do look down....I smile.
Changing providers
Well, after a few more visits with Dr G and feeling that yucky, trapped, and uncomfortable feeling, I knew it was time to switch providers. I was so upset after my last meeting with him and got in the car and just prayed. As soon as I said, "Ok Heavenly Father, I am going to switch to someone else." Then I felt the peace come in. For weeks now I've been searching for the right fit for me with a provider who I trust and who believes in me and I hope I've found them.
I'll be making a long drive to the hospital which is nerve wracking because of how short my labors are, but I still feel the sense of calm that everything will be ok.
It helps that I've been done this road before and I know how bad things can turn out if you stay with a provider you do not trust. Troy is so devoted to making sure we are with the right Dr.'s. He would move mountains to make sure we don't end up with someone we don't feel safe with. Seeing him protect me through the pregnancy strengthens my trust that he will protect me during labor as well, if I can't advocate for myself.
I'll be making a long drive to the hospital which is nerve wracking because of how short my labors are, but I still feel the sense of calm that everything will be ok.
It helps that I've been done this road before and I know how bad things can turn out if you stay with a provider you do not trust. Troy is so devoted to making sure we are with the right Dr.'s. He would move mountains to make sure we don't end up with someone we don't feel safe with. Seeing him protect me through the pregnancy strengthens my trust that he will protect me during labor as well, if I can't advocate for myself.
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